Perspective -
Another week has come and gone. My weeks have settled into a pretty
good groove or routine. And my homesickness is finally settling down
(I've decided I miss having time with my family and my boyfriend more
than actually being home in Iowa or at LCU). And I've been working on a
few different projects and finally starting to see them come together
over the last couple of days.
As I've been working on various things for the next team of gringos coming down in October and working on a picture project for our team, I've been reminded of and able to better recognize how I prefer to be in the background of things. I am more the type of person to be involved in support and making things happen behind the scenes rather than leading, directing or organizing things with others following along. I don't like to lead. My personality isn't one that does well in leading (just look at my DISC assessment from AIM at LCU freshman year... hahah). I prefer to take on a task and do it without a lot of attention or eyes on me. I also hate dealing with anyone over the age of 11. I can teach a class of 15 five year olds. But put me in front of a group of youth or adults and I shut down. I don't enjoy it and my shyness and fear takes over to the point of me blushing a bright tomato red and stumbling over my words and thoughts to the point of not being understood.
I came to Peru with the silly expectation that somehow this internship was going to be the thing that determined or set in stone what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. I thought it is/was going to make or break my life as a missionary. But that's beginning to change (thank goodness). Yes, it still may influence my future in many or big ways. But I think more than that, this trip is setting in stone more of my personality, my gifts, my passions while making it more and more clear to me of how GOD created me and what He has placed in my life to grow me as a person. Peru is one of those things that He is using to grow me as a person, a woman of faith. He is using it to challenge my faith in Him, making me question just how much I trust, love and follow Him. He is using it to give me a new perspective/understanding of myself as a human being and on the world as He sees it. He is using it to guide me more in growing up, maturing and becoming more the person that He created me to be. I am reminded of the words in Jeremiah of how GOD set the prophet aside from before he was even born and had a specific purpose for him, a specific life, a specific personality. We all have that in a sense. And GOD is using my time here in Peru to help me better see that.
So, I don't like leading. I like being in the background. I don't like working with anyone over the age of 11. I prefer to be in a role of support for the team and church. I prefer to do the little things that usually go unnoticed, but still need to be done. That is who I am. That is more me than a leader, a great evangelist, a fabulous public speaker or any other silly thing like that. And Peru is helping me gain a new perspective on all of that. I may not have my make it or break it moment as a missionary while I'm here in Peru. But I am better learning who I am and who God created and wants me to be. And I think that's probably one of the best lessons I could learn these 6 months in Peru.
As I've been working on various things for the next team of gringos coming down in October and working on a picture project for our team, I've been reminded of and able to better recognize how I prefer to be in the background of things. I am more the type of person to be involved in support and making things happen behind the scenes rather than leading, directing or organizing things with others following along. I don't like to lead. My personality isn't one that does well in leading (just look at my DISC assessment from AIM at LCU freshman year... hahah). I prefer to take on a task and do it without a lot of attention or eyes on me. I also hate dealing with anyone over the age of 11. I can teach a class of 15 five year olds. But put me in front of a group of youth or adults and I shut down. I don't enjoy it and my shyness and fear takes over to the point of me blushing a bright tomato red and stumbling over my words and thoughts to the point of not being understood.
I came to Peru with the silly expectation that somehow this internship was going to be the thing that determined or set in stone what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. I thought it is/was going to make or break my life as a missionary. But that's beginning to change (thank goodness). Yes, it still may influence my future in many or big ways. But I think more than that, this trip is setting in stone more of my personality, my gifts, my passions while making it more and more clear to me of how GOD created me and what He has placed in my life to grow me as a person. Peru is one of those things that He is using to grow me as a person, a woman of faith. He is using it to challenge my faith in Him, making me question just how much I trust, love and follow Him. He is using it to give me a new perspective/understanding of myself as a human being and on the world as He sees it. He is using it to guide me more in growing up, maturing and becoming more the person that He created me to be. I am reminded of the words in Jeremiah of how GOD set the prophet aside from before he was even born and had a specific purpose for him, a specific life, a specific personality. We all have that in a sense. And GOD is using my time here in Peru to help me better see that.
So, I don't like leading. I like being in the background. I don't like working with anyone over the age of 11. I prefer to be in a role of support for the team and church. I prefer to do the little things that usually go unnoticed, but still need to be done. That is who I am. That is more me than a leader, a great evangelist, a fabulous public speaker or any other silly thing like that. And Peru is helping me gain a new perspective on all of that. I may not have my make it or break it moment as a missionary while I'm here in Peru. But I am better learning who I am and who God created and wants me to be. And I think that's probably one of the best lessons I could learn these 6 months in Peru.
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