Needing to write a paper... but too many other thoughts
I have an 8-10 page paper on cross-cultural crisis counseling due in two days. And I have had the research part of it done for two weeks. But haven't had any desire to write. Now, I have to get it written. And of course, what happens once I try to sit down and write it out? I have a million other thoughts bombarding me. It's like my head is screaming and bouncing in a million different directions and so my thoughts for my paper are being over-powered. It's tough and frustrating. So, I decided to write some of those thoughts out on here. Hoping that it will get my head calmed down enough to work on my paper tonight and tomorrow so that I can finish and turn it in before heading out on Week of E and turning my attention to my senior seminar of the Bible project.
Yesterday was an interesting day. It seemed to be an emotional roller-coaster for me. And by the time I crawled into bed at midnight I was exhausted in every way imaginable. I just had a lot to do. Lots of meetings or places to be with not a lot of time in between to be able to start or finish any homework. I had errands to run in town, work hours to fulfill, SFG/Vespers/floor devos to attend. And then had some time with the girls in my SFG after all of that. It was a crazy night. But the one thing that I noticed that was constant was my desire to be in conversation with God.
I have never been one to have much faith in prayer. And would rather spend hours writing, reading and studying through the Bible instead of quieting myself and simply talking to God. I don't really know why that is. But I've always been that way it seems. This semester I am taking a class called "Prayer Practice and Spiritual Transformation" with the amazing Dr. Windham as the professor (he is one of my favorites and is the most humble man anyone could ever hope to know or study under). It's the first semester this class has ever been taught, so it is very much an experiment. But it has been incredible and beyond anything I could have ever hoped for it to be. I have been more challenged and grown through this class than I have been in most of my Bible/theology classes here at LCU over the last 3.5 years. Not that I haven't been challenged in other classes. This one is just different for some reason. The whole purpose and goal is to learn how to pray without ceasing the way Paul implores the Churches to. And while we may have times of lecture and discussion... we spend the majority of our time in prayer. Learning about posture and attitude, prayers of petition and praise, simple and empathic prayers. And so much more.
Through this class, I have found myself having a deep, true desire to be close to God, to be in conversation with Him, to give everything over to Him. I have begun keeping a prayer list in my journal and add to it almost daily. I write my prayers out because I get distracted if I don't. But it has been incredible to see how my prayers are beginning to become real to me, how I am finally having faith that God hears me and cares about what I say.
Yesterday, with everything going on, was filled with answers to prayer. I found answers to questions that I had been asking for a long time. I had prayers for friends and family answered in different ways that brought huge smiles to my face. I felt close to God and as though I was in His presence more than ever before. That, my friends, is an incredible feeling. And one that I pray I experience more as I continue to learn about prayer. And one that I pray you all can experience in your own lives and walk with God. Be blessed my dear friends. God is near.
Yesterday was an interesting day. It seemed to be an emotional roller-coaster for me. And by the time I crawled into bed at midnight I was exhausted in every way imaginable. I just had a lot to do. Lots of meetings or places to be with not a lot of time in between to be able to start or finish any homework. I had errands to run in town, work hours to fulfill, SFG/Vespers/floor devos to attend. And then had some time with the girls in my SFG after all of that. It was a crazy night. But the one thing that I noticed that was constant was my desire to be in conversation with God.
I have never been one to have much faith in prayer. And would rather spend hours writing, reading and studying through the Bible instead of quieting myself and simply talking to God. I don't really know why that is. But I've always been that way it seems. This semester I am taking a class called "Prayer Practice and Spiritual Transformation" with the amazing Dr. Windham as the professor (he is one of my favorites and is the most humble man anyone could ever hope to know or study under). It's the first semester this class has ever been taught, so it is very much an experiment. But it has been incredible and beyond anything I could have ever hoped for it to be. I have been more challenged and grown through this class than I have been in most of my Bible/theology classes here at LCU over the last 3.5 years. Not that I haven't been challenged in other classes. This one is just different for some reason. The whole purpose and goal is to learn how to pray without ceasing the way Paul implores the Churches to. And while we may have times of lecture and discussion... we spend the majority of our time in prayer. Learning about posture and attitude, prayers of petition and praise, simple and empathic prayers. And so much more.
Through this class, I have found myself having a deep, true desire to be close to God, to be in conversation with Him, to give everything over to Him. I have begun keeping a prayer list in my journal and add to it almost daily. I write my prayers out because I get distracted if I don't. But it has been incredible to see how my prayers are beginning to become real to me, how I am finally having faith that God hears me and cares about what I say.
Yesterday, with everything going on, was filled with answers to prayer. I found answers to questions that I had been asking for a long time. I had prayers for friends and family answered in different ways that brought huge smiles to my face. I felt close to God and as though I was in His presence more than ever before. That, my friends, is an incredible feeling. And one that I pray I experience more as I continue to learn about prayer. And one that I pray you all can experience in your own lives and walk with God. Be blessed my dear friends. God is near.
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